


We Are the Kids That You Never Can Kill

by officialarrow



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Cancer, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-03
Updated: 2015-10-03
Packaged: 2018-04-24 13:44:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 4,398
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4921846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/officialarrow/pseuds/officialarrow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Oliver Queen and Felicity Smoak has been best friends since they were kids. One day everything changes, and their friendship becomes more. However, once they are happy, there is always something that ruins it.<br/>When Oliver and Felicity get some bad news, everything changes and their relationship is put to the test.<br/>A two-part story about friendship, love and sickness.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Part One

 

**Part One**

 

* * *

 

He remembers the first day he’d met her, when he was six years old. The day her mother’s car had parked outside the house next door. She had jumped out of the car holding a stuffed penguin with her pink glasses. Their neighborhood was filled with almost exclusively elderly people, so there weren’t many kids. He wanted another kid to play with, so he had walked up to her and stretched out his hand like his father had taught him to do when he met a person for the first time. She grabbed his hand and shook it, before giving him a smile.

“Hi, my name is Felicity. What is your name?” She smiled again and brought the stuffed penguin up to her face and hid it in the soft stomach.

“My name is Oliver. Do you wanna ride our bikes?” She nodded and got her bike from her mother and followed him down the neighborhood. They didn’t talk much that first bike ride, but it was still the start of their friendship.

He stopped his bike when she was getting too far behind him. Once she reached him, she stopped up and smiled at him.

“I know ‘bout this place that I could show you. It’s really cool, c’mon let's go!” He got on his bike again, and this time he kept the same pace as her. They rode their bikes for about ten minutes before they got to a hill. There was a path leading up to the hill and into a forest. They ran up the path and after a while they were into the forest. It was the summer before school started for both of them, and the forest was really green and pretty at this point in the year. Soon they reached the end of the forest and the top of the hill. When they got to the opening where there was a big rock, they climbed up on it and sat there. Up there you could see almost the entire city from afar. They didn’t say much, but they didn’t have to.

As the years went by, it became almost like a daily thing to go up to the rock and talk about everything. Sometimes it would be the silly things, like crushes or gossip. Everything was always on the topic for both of them.

In later years, he realized he’d never really thought about the possibility of them loving each other more than what friends do. He hadn’t considered it, and by the way that she was acting towards him he got the feeling that she hadn’t considered it herself either.

Which is why, one faithful night, something happened that surprised both of them.

It was the week before prom, and Oliver was kind of getting stressed about not having a date yet. Fortunately, Felicity hadn’t accepted any of the requests she had gotten so far, so he figured he’d just go for it. They were both sitting on the rock, and the night sky was starting to get darker by the minute.

“So, Felicity, I was thinking about prom. Since you don’t have a date…” He was interrupted immediately by Felicity.

“Yeah, well there is no way I’m ever accepting to go to prom with either John or Brad. I mean, John is a nice guy and I know he’s our friend, but everyone knows Lyla is dying for him to ask her! And Brad… well, let’s face it, if you think I was going to accept a date from a guy who can’t even multiply then you got it wrong my friend. I mean, going out with them would be as crazy as going out with you…” She paused and looked at him, and saw the shocked look he was giving her. “Oh, you weren’t finished talking? Sorry, continue.” He didn’t even flinch, he just kept giving her the same shocked look. “What?”

“I’m not sure I want to.” She frowned, clearly not taking the hint.

“Why?” He was starting to get uncomfortable by this point. “Seriously, just tell me.”

“Okay, well this is kind of awkward, but I was going to ask you, that since neither of us has dates, that we could go together. But I mean, you didn’t want to…” He kept staring down at his feet the entire time he was talking, so he didn’t catch the positively shocked look Felicity was giving him.

“Of course I want to!” She leaned over and hugged him hard, and he was so surprised that he couldn’t get any words out.

“You really do? Because it seemed like you didn’t want to, you know, like seconds ago…” She gave him a cracked smile.

“Well, I kinda wanted you to ask me, but then I blurted out that when it wasn’t even the thing I wanted…” He nodded and smiled at her. She blushed slightly and laughed. Then she looked up at him with a smile, and it hit him like a sledgehammer. The feelings came all at once, hitting him deep in the chest. Her smile was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen, and it made his heart warm harder than he had ever experienced. How strange, that one moment you don’t see it, and the next it’s everything you can see.

He didn’t know how it could have happened so soon, or why it had happened just now when they were both just seventeen, but the one thing that he knew was that he was in love with her. No doubt, he could tell as much by his feelings.

The thrilling feeling of his next move sent shivers down his spine. He was sure he had never felt more scared, as he leant in and placed his lips gently against hers. The move surprised her, but she didn’t back away. She lent into the kiss and started kissing him back. It was an amazing kiss. It was one he had never thought he could ever have with a girl like Felicity. In that moment, she became irresistible.

Once they broke up the kiss, she whimpered silently, just loud enough for him to hear. He looked her in the eyes as their breaths touched one another.

“Wow, I’ve been waiting for you to do that for ages.” She breathed out, and he chuckled.

 

The next week was filled with kisses and exploration of the new beginning. It was as if some big relief had been lifted off his chest. Of course, it would soon be filled with smaller things. Like for example, when Felicity was freaking out about prom.

The doorbell rang furiously as Oliver ran down the stairs. He was lucky that both his parents were at work and not home. They wouldn’t be too satisfied with that. He opened the door to find Felicity standing there.

“Oliver we have an emergency!” Felicity came bursting through the doorway and into his house.

“What? What now?”

“I just found out my mom accidentally broke the heel of one of my heels I was going to wear at prom!” Oliver was left with an open mouth.

“Really? That’s… the emergency?” She just looked at him like he had said something unbelievable.

“It is a real emergency, yes!” She went on and on about how that was a real emergency and that it needed to be taken seriously. When he looked back at this time, he found it hard to believe she would ever consider this as an emergency. Because what was about to happen made that emergency seem so incredibly silly. He still couldn’t believe that this was once considered her only worry. It was a much simpler time.

 

As prom came and went by, Felicity and Oliver lived the blissful new romance without much worries. Two months went by, and they still were just as much in love. Oliver couldn’t believe he could ever have been this happy with the girl he hadn’t even considered to be his girlfriend only three months ago.

 

But as time goes by and you are sure that nothing can ever ruin that happiness that you feel, something always does…

 

He got home from school a normal Tuesday feeling tired. He had been to football practice all afternoon, and he could feel his stomach growling for food. He went into the kitchen and grabbed an apple when he heard his mother’s voice. It wasn’t that calm and loving voice that she usually had to just about everyone. No, this was a concerned voice filled with sadness. It was neither calm nor as she usually talked.

“Oh God, I’m so sorry.” Her voice sounded like she was extremely worried. That was strange. His mother was a funeral director, and she was used to taking a few sad calls. This one, however, sounded like it was ten times as hard for her.

“That is just terrible. If there is anything you need, you call me okay? Oh God, what is he going to say…” His mother continued talking about something, but he figured he would eavesdrop too much. He didn’t like it when she did it.

About ten minutes later his mother entered the living room. Oliver was watching television like he usually did before dinner.

“Hey mom, could you get started on dinner? I’m getting really hungry. I ate an apple not so long ago, but that didn’t really help much.” He didn’t notice the face his mother had.

When he looks back at that moment, he would have done about anything to go back and not know for just a few moments. Just a little more time in oblivion, before his world would be ruined.

“Oliver.” His mother just said his name, in the same tone as before.

“What?” He kept staring at the TV as his mother took a few deep breaths before continuing.

“Oliver, I need to tell you something.” He looked up now to see his mother standing there with a worried look. She sat down beside him on the couch and took his hand.

“What is it? Mom?” He sounded worried now too. His heart was pounding hard in his chest and he felt like he soon wouldn’t be able to breathe as usual.

She took a deep breath.

“I just spoke on the phone.” He nodded and waited for her to continue. “It was Donna.” His heart beat so fast he had to cough.

“Felicity’s mom?” The voice that came out was weak. His mother nodded. “What… what is it? Mom you need to tell me? Did something happen to Felicity?” He was yelling now.

“They just came home from the hospital, dear.” Oliver looked at his mother in confusion and worry. “And they had some bad news.” Oliver shook his head and stared into his mother’s eyes.

“What was the news?” He was getting really, really worried.

When she told it, his head felt like it would explode and his heart felt like it would explode too.

“Felicity wasn’t feeling too good the last few days, and you know that since she said she was sick, but it got really bad so they went to the hospital. The doctor wanted to do some tests and…” His mom took a few deep breaths. “Felicity was diagnosed with cancer. It’s bad honey, I’m so sorry. They’re going to fight it and they’re going to do everything they can, but it’s still pretty bad. I’m so sorry honey. I know you love her. ” His mother leant in to hug him. She muttered a few more ‘I’m sorry’s, and then hugged him even harder. He wondered how she couldn’t have told him that she was feeling that bad, or that she was in the hospital. He wondered if she had felt like this for a long time. He wasn’t mad, and he wasn’t hurt. He was only worried about her. He couldn’t get any words out.

Oh, how he wished he could go back to the time he didn’t know.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Part Two is going to get really heavy, so I'd prepare for that.


	2. Part Two

 

**Part Two**

 

* * *

 

He had kept some distance that day. He wanted to visit her and see if she was all right, but he felt that if he did he might upset her or something, and that maybe she needed to deal with it herself first. He wasn’t sure how to act now, because how do you act in front of someone who just recently got cancer? There is no answer.

He wanted to be sympathetic to her, because you need to be sympathetic. Then again, Felicity hated that, so then maybe she would feel that he didn’t treat her like he used to because maybe she just wanted to be treated the same. Of course, you can’t treat a person the same after learning they got cancer. There is just no way you can go back, there are too many factors involved.

He couldn’t sleep. Not while thinking about Felicity. Was she going to die? What would her future look like if she survived?

The next day went by as slowly as the other days in that week. Without Felicity by his side, it felt like his day was incomplete. When he got home, he looked over to her house, and he couldn’t fight the urge any more to go and ask her how she was doing. He dropped his backpack inside his house and ran over to hers. He rang the doorbell and waited for someone to open the door.

Her mother opened it a minute later, and when she saw him she gave him a smile. It wasn’t a warm smile, and it wasn’t a loving one either. It was a sad one. The concern in her face was so obvious that even a high school student with average grades could see it.

“Hello Oliver.” She invited him into the house, and said it was okay for him to go upstairs to Felicity. The stairs felt like they would never end. His heart kept pounding hard in his chest as he approached the door to her room. He took a deep breath and knocked carefully on the door. After a while a low voice called him in.

He walked carefully into her room. It felt so different in a way. He’d been to her room a million times, and now it felt completely different. It looked the same, but the sense he got from it was unfamiliar.

“Oliver?” Her head lifted off the bed and she was curled up under a duvet. Her voice was weaker than normal, and her eyes looked really tired. The room was poorly lit, and it was clear that she had been sleeping. He walked over to the bed and lied down next to her on it.

“Hi Felicity.” His voice was low as he watched her. Her breathing was a silent wheezing. It sounded like she was sleeping, but her glassy eyes were staring into his. “I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.” It came out more like a breath. She pulled the duvet over him too, and he could feel her cold skin. He scooped closer to her and wrapped his warm hands around her. She had to have been freezing, because when she felt his warmth she let out a shivering breath of relief.

“How are you feeling?” He whispered softly, trying to hide the pain and worry in his voice.

“I’m freezing like crazy and just thinking about that shit being in my body makes me feel uncomfortable.”

“Well, I can hopefully help with freezing.” She smiled a little. “Tell me about it Felicity.” She looked at him for a long time before she continued.

“I was feeling really sick this week, and also weak. Then I noticed I had lost some weight without even trying, and it didn’t look very healthy. Each night I woke up sweating and my bones hurt a lot. I told my mom and she brought me to the hospital. The doctor examined me and took a blood test, and then today we got called in and they told me I had leukemia.” It was a lot of information to process.

“How long did you experience it?” He was really wondering about how long she had felt sick and why she hadn’t told him about it, but he kept his mouth shut about that.

“A few months, but only the exhaustion, mostly. The cold came a week ago.” He felt a little sad about her not sharing it with him, but he didn’t really care about that right now.

“Is it…? Do people…?” He couldn’t say it.

“People can survive it, Oliver. We’re going to fight it, but…”

“No!” His sudden change in tone frightened her a bit. “Sorry… I just… I can’t think about that. Not right now.”  He felt her cold hands stroke his cheek.

“Then lets not talk about it either. Can we just sleep? I’m so tired…” He nodded and she put her head on his chest. He could feel her slowly drifting into sleep. He couldn’t sleep. He just stayed there and focused on hearing every breath that she took.

 

After Felicity started her treatment, she became more and more weak. She tried to keep up with him, but she was mostly tired. He often came to her house where she would be full of energy at first, but then a little later she would fall asleep on his chest. He didn’t mind, because he only wanted to be near her. He only wanted to smell her hair and feel her next to him instead of worrying that she would drift away. One day, after she came home from treatment, she was having a bad day. The treatment days were often like that. He tried to just act normal, because that was how she had wanted it.

“I’m gonna lose my hair soon.” The words came blurting out of Felicity as her and Oliver were watching a movie in her room.

“So?” He ate some popcorn and continued watching the movie in front of them.

“So? Really? It’s like you don’t get anything sometimes Oliver! I’m going to lose my hair! I’m going to be bald and disgusting and you’ll probably not be attracted to me anymore.” Oliver took the remote and paused the movie.

“Stop talking shit like that Felicity. I couldn’t give a less fuck if you had hair or not. You’re still you, Felicity. That’s all I care about. It’s just hair, it’s not going to change you that much. You’ll be just as beautiful as you are now. Besides, it’ll grow back.” He didn’t talk in that soft voice anymore. His voice was sterner now. “Hey, I’ll shave my head too.” He made a gesture with his hand over his hair.

“No, I like your hair. It’s so silky and perfect, you don’t have to do that for me.” She stroked his cheek with her cold hand.

“Are you kidding me? You’re going to have the awesome opportunity of not having any annoying long hair on your head and you’re telling me I can’t join? Please, it’ll be a nice change.”

She chuckled a bit and leant in to kiss him.

“Besides, if it looks really terrible on me, my hair actually grows pretty fast so I won’t look that ugly.” She started laughing a bit and kissed him some more. They both shaved their heads later that afternoon.

 

After a few months, Felicity was really struggling with the treatment. She couldn’t attend school anymore, because she was feeling so weak all the time. He visited her everyday, letting her help him with his homework and letting her sleep on his chest. One day was a particularly bad one.

“I think you should go.” Oliver looked up from his chemistry book where he was sitting on the floor in front of Felicity who was sitting in a chair wrapped in a blanket with a beanie over her bald head. She was looking a bit pale, and she hadn’t been in the best mood that day.

“What? I really need your help here, Felicity. I’m going to fail the test next Monday if you don’t help me.” He flipped a page over.

“No, I mean that you should just go and not come back.” Her words confused him, and he looked up.

“What? Why? I’m your boyfriend, of course I’ll be here everyday. Stop talking like that Felicity.”

“Maybe you shouldn’t be.” He looked up at her in shock. “I just don’t want you to get hurt if I…” He interrupted her.

“Stop! Felicity, stop it!” Oliver was yelling now.

“No Oliver, I just want to protect you. I don’t want you to get more hurt than you need to be.”   
“Look, you can break up with me, that’s fine. I don’t care if I’m not your boyfriend anymore. It is your choice whether you want to break up with me.” He took a pause. “But I’ll still be your best friend. I don’t care if I’m not your boyfriend, because I won’t ever leave you. I’ll be your best friend no matter what. You can’t break up with me as your best friend. That is just not possible.” She started crying, and nodded. He went over to her, lifted her up and sat down in the chair with her arms wrapped around him. She cried into his shoulders, and he could feel the tears press onto his eyes.

“I’m just so afraid to leave you and hurt you. What if I leave and then you never move on? What if you never do anything extraordinary? What if you never do anything with your life?” She talked into his shoulder, and he felt a few tears fall down his cheek.

“I promise I won’t do that, Felicity. I promise.”

 

She never got any better. She just kept getting more and more tired. Each day was another battle and he saw how much it affected her. Some days were better than others, just like some days were always worse than others. He had gotten more used to the fact that she probably would never get better, and it was sad and unbearable, but he wouldn’t let it paralyze him. If he only had a limited time with her he would see to it that they made the best out of it. And they did, or they tried to.

“Oliver?” They were watching a movie in her room, and her mother had just gone out for a few errands.

“Yeah?”

“I wanted to ask you something…”

“Sure, anything.” She took a long pause. “Felicity?”

“Sorry, it’s just that I don’t know how to ask it.”

“Just ask me Felicity, I don’t mind.”

“Will you have sex with me?” He immediately stiffened and got a shocked look on his face.

“What?”

“It’s just that I really don’t want to be a virgin if I die. I want to know what it’s like!” Oliver couldn’t get any words out. “Please, Oliver. It’s not like you’re going to get infected with cancer…”

“No! It’s just that, are you sure you’re up for that?” She kissed him on the mouth.

“Yes, I am really sure.” They continued kissing for a while. Kissing eventually turned into more, and by the end they were in her bed, Felicity curled up next to Oliver.

“Can I ask you one more thing?” Felicity said sleepily on top of Oliver’s chest.

“Sure.” He chuckled.

“Can you take me up to the rock? I want to see it one last time.” He felt like he couldn’t get any words out. It had all become so real at this point. It was all pointing to that cruel destiny.

“Yeah.” He said softly.

 

A week later Felicity had started to get really bad, so Oliver carried her up to the rock. She was wearing sweats and a beanie, and she was really pale and skinny. He placed her onto the rock and she smiled. It was the first smile he had seen in a week.

“It’s so beautiful up here. Thank you for carrying me.” Her voice was low and weak.

“No problem.” His voice was sad, even though he had tried not to sound so sad.

“Oliver no, please don’t be sad.” Her hoarse voice wasn’t helping much.

“How can I not be sad? I’m not only losing my girlfriend and the love of my life I am also losing my best friend.”

“You’ll still have John and Tommy…”

“But I won’t have you.”

“You’ll be okay.”

“Yeah, but how do think I’ll feel? How do you think I’ll feel when I lose the girl I love and the person I love and need more than anyone else?”

“I’m so sorry, Oliver. I really don’t want to leave you.” She hugged him, and he hugged her back. Together, they watched the last sunset they would ever watch together on that rock.

 

A few days later, Felicity was sent to the hospital. Her condition had worsened. Oliver stayed with her whenever he could, and when he couldn’t he would sneak in and lie next to her in the bed.

“I can’t thank you enough for the way you have made my life, however short it was, so beautiful and amazing.” Felicity was looking at him as she spoke.

“You did that too.” He kissed her, but he noticed she didn’t have strength enough to kiss him back. “I love you so much.” He muttered against her mouth.

“I love you too.” She whispered.

Then he heard a choking sound coming from her.

“Felicity?” Oliver raised his voice, and the fear struck him. “Felicity what is happening?” He was starting to panic at this point. “Nurse! I need some help here!” The alarms started going off and a nurse burst in through the door.

He remembered the time before he kissed her that first time. He remembered feeling more afraid than ever and he was so sure he would never feel more afraid.

That night he felt worse than that time. He felt so afraid that he almost passed out.

 

Felicity went into a coma after that. Her body was so weak. Oliver stayed with her each day, not wanting to miss a second. He would just look at her, praying that each time wouldn’t be the last time.

 

Felicity Smoak died eight days later, when her body couldn’t take it anymore.

 

 


End file.
